Calling all HillBillies, Hayseeds & Yokels!

[Lancashire HillBilly]

I have started a group for Agrarians and true country-folk, it is moderated but get in touch and join if you wish mateys...

[bornfree]

I water my hanging baskets when I get around to it, but I suspect that you're looking for more commitment than this, more evidence of a love for all things rustic.
Ok, how's this: I sometimes look at cows when I'm driving in the countryside. At least, I think they're cows.

[Lancashire HillBilly]

Heh Heh, maybe we can resettle you!

[Emma Utting]

I come from a very long line of agricultural labourers and make my own jam from my own trees although I live against my will in a big city at the mo. Do I count?

[Lily]

I come from a very long line of agricultural labourers and make my own jam from my own trees although I live against my will in a big city at the mo. Do I count?

Tree jam....?

[Emma Utting]

Get with the jam jargon, lily.

[bornfree]

Don't you know about tree jam? There's a tree jam plantation quite near me, the plantation workers simply tap a jam jar against the trunk of the jam tree and out oozes jam.
I too am a country yokel imprisoned against my will in an urban environment. Secretly, I'd love to cross dress by putting on a smock and Morris dancing (named after the Morris Minor, I understand) but I might lose cred.
Anyway, luckily someone around here is shooting pigeons, so I can experience the countryside - dead animals - without actually having to go into it.

[Emma Utting]

I'm appalled at your jocular attitudes! Were is Lancashire Hillbilly? Yokels against townies and the first one to pop out of the sedge gets it from the Norfolk strawberry canon. You should be ashamed!

[Lily]

Get with the jam jargon, lily.

Jam jargon?

Are you quite alright SF?

[Lily]

Don't you know about tree jam? There's a tree jam plantation quite near me, the plantation workers simply tap a jam jar against the trunk of the jam tree and out oozes jam.
I too am a country yokel imprisoned against my will in an urban environment. Secretly, I'd love to cross dress by putting on a smock and Morris dancing (named after the Morris Minor, I understand) but I might lose cred.
Anyway, luckily someone around here is shooting pigeons, so I can experience the countryside - dead animals - without actually having to go into it.

Methinks you are taking z pI5s - However, if you ever happen to come across a nutella tree plantation round your way please do let me know and I'll balance as many empty jars as I can in the little basket on my bike.

If you dressed up as a Morris dancer you would have 0% cred and would possibly be hunted by the same person shooting pigeons